I'm gonna love you
by its a story of love
Summary: OQ angst, fluff and smut through the years. Follows the song Like I'm gonna lose you by Meghan Trainor and John Legend


_**A/N This is for the german squad ( thedeadpuppies) on tumblr who I tricked on anon but ran out of hours in the day.**_

 _ **This is angsty, fluff, smut- OQ with some Dragon Queen and Stable Boy thrown in. Sorry I know some of you ship SQ/CS. I tried to fit it in but it didn't work with the song.**_

 _ **Song is – Like I'm gonna lose you by Meghan Trainor and John Legend**_

 _ **Enjoy**_

 _ **/**_

 _ **Found myself dreaming**_

 _ **In silver and gold**_

 _ **Like a scene from a movie**_

 _ **That every broken heart knows.**_

Regina would never forget Daniel. The way he made her feel- like the world was theirs, to discover, to love, to hate, to make their own. The way he would smile, like there was nothing else to light the day. His laugh was free of fear, and full of hope. Regina had always been reluctant to define her future by a man. Yet it was the truth. Her future was with Daniel. Or the future she wished for was with Daniel, them riding through the forest, not a care in the world. Marrying under the stars. Having a child, teaching them how to love freely with no boundaries. Life had other plans.

She remembers Maleficent. If Daniel awoke her heart, her feelings, then Maleficent set it on fire. Not literally, although Regina she was tempted at times. With Daniel it was sweet love, with Mal it was passionate. They had both failed to control their lust, losing themselves in deep passionate kisses, in-between lessons. Nights they pleasured each other. Regina had been shy and relatively innocent, she found herself wanting to please Mal, and they found their rhythm bringing each other to climax, sometimes tenderly other times fast and hot. It was perhaps nothing more than a lust filled fling. Yet it always left them wanting more. Wandering what if? Two broken women, desperately trying to work out their place in a world where they didn't want to belong, found themselves in each other. It could never work. Love didn't work for people like them. They had to be content with the dreams of yesterday.

Saying goodbye to Henry was one of the hardest things she had to do. He had grown up to be such a handsome smart young boy. She tried to be strong for him. Knew that this she had to do. She smiled and hugged him. She committed everything to memory, still she longed for this scene not to play. For this to be an old movie. A story on the news.

 _ **We were walking on moonlight**_

 _ **And you'll pull me close**_

Their walk in the moonlight was one of Regina's fondest memories. It was just her and Robin. Together. No villains or curses. No impending doom. Just a stroll in their hometown with the moon to guide their way. There is something so magical about the world at night. Everything seems different. Yet it offers no lies. Regina found that you hear things more acutely. You look closer, afraid you might fall so you see more. He pulled her close, tucking a lose strand behind her ear, he gently bought his lips to hers. A kiss that meant something more. The light of the moon making the forest look magical. They were here now and this was true.

 _ **Split second and you'd disappeared**_

 _ **And I was all alone**_

How can one step destroy someone's life? Shatter your dreams. A split second, a split second that seemed to last eternity. Hands touching Hands. Tears rolling down their faces. Neither of them wanted to leave the other. He had to though. She had to let him. He was a man of honour, a man of love. Minutes ago he'd chosen her. Now he was leaving. With his wife and child. With his family. Regina had prematurely painted a picture of her own family. She was all alone.

 _ **Woke up in tears**_

Regina cried herself to sleep. Willing her tears to be silent. Willing Henry not to hear. She was broken, yet again, but she had to be strong. For Henry. For Robin. Robin would want her to be strong. She smiled; it didn't quite reach her eyes. Her eyes spoke for her; they held the story of pain, of loss, of grief, denial. She gazed towards the cold gravestone. This wasn't real. It couldn't be. Everyone was waiting for her to say something. What could she say? She had tried to think of things to say like a joke or a memory. She came up with nothing. Instead she closed her eyes imagining he was standing next to her, caressing her, kissing her softly. She took a deep breath.

I don't know what to say. I don't know if there are any words. Most of you have only known me as the Evil Queen, when I valued vengeance over love. Where I destroyed villages, crushed hearts, killed without a second thought. Most of you have known me as Mayor Mills, the woman with the sensible pantsuits and a cold heart. I hope that you have begun to see me as Regina, someone who is all of those people. I will not hesitate to speak my mind when one of you idiots has a hair brained idea to get us killed. I will summon up a fireball at the flick of my wrist if I need to. I don't wear my emotions on my sleeve because most of the times I don't even know what I'm feeling. I can be harsh but I love fiercely. I protect those I love. Robin didn't see me as the Evil Queen, the Mayor, or even Regina. He saw straight through me. He saw me as my raw emotions- my anger, my hurt, my humour. My love. My soul. I scoffed at love and hope. I did not want to believe in them. They'd hurt me too many times before. He offered his heart, as I offered mine. He saw me as the furthest thing from the monster I believed I'd come. I will not say our love or our life is over. It's just on pause. Robin I love you. I'm not saying goodbye

 _ **With you by my side**_

 _ **Breath of relief**_

 _ **Then I realised**_

 _ **No we're not promised tomorrow**_

It wasn't real. It was a dream, well nightmare. It had happened every night since the incident. They did not refer to it as his death. Turns out sometimes miracles happen. That being soulmates is a truly powerful thing. It had been a tough month. She'd cried every night. Locked herself away. She'd hoped it wasn't real but knew that life is cruel. She never expected a knock on the door, with Robin wearing a sheepish grin. Neither had really known how to react. You spend every day trying to think of how to move on. How to remember them without it being like a knife to the heart. You try and speak to people.

She still wept. There had barely been a day that had passed without unprompted tears. Every smell- that of pine cones and whiskey, every lingering touch like a spark of electricity. Every taste, can someone taste like home? Was somehow too much and not enough at the same time.

He held her. He cried with her. He was there. She breathed. Let herself begin to feel alive.

They had spent their life knowing that no one is promised tomorrow, but you don't realise how close tomorrow is until it comes and your world has changed forever.

 _ **So I'm gonna love you**_

 _ **Like I'm gonna lose you**_

 _ **I'm gonna hold you**_

 _ **Like I'm saying goodbye**_

It had been three years since the day Robin had returned. Every moment they had treasured.

There had been significant changes- for one they were now married. The day had been beautiful, a true blessing, celebration of love. Of love that lasts forever.

Roland had returned just last year- still the fresh faced dimple boy, he wasn't quite so small anymore and that made both their hearts ache a little. They were worried what he would think, what he would say. They needn't have worried. He had embraced his mama and papa in a hug. "I'm home"

The Evil Queen had made an appearance. It was an interesting time for the both of them, Regina had been petrified. Her family helped both her and the queen through it.

Henry was dating Violet, well he had been for a while, but had finally decided his family was cool enough (and reassured that no fireballs would make an appearance).

It wasn't necessarily these moments that defined the past three years though. It was the smiles shared among the family. It was laughter at the dinner table. It was reading baby Mia a bed time story. It was the soft kisses. It was holding hands on the way to grannies.

 _ **In the blink of an eye**_

 _ **Just a whisper of smoke**_

 _ **You could lose everything**_

 _ **The truth is you'll never know**_

They were talking about their future. He promised her a future. He lied to her. He was going to break his promise. He had vowed never to do that. Yet there was no other choice. No other selfless choice. He couldn't stand there and do nothing. He couldn't watch her die, watch her soul disappear. He recalled the first time they had met. "Don't get in the way" He'd replied he wouldn't dream of it." He hadn't dared to dream what their life could hold for them. He was grateful for every smile. Every laugh. Every tear.

He could see her heart breaking. She knew. She always knew. He smiled, a genuine, if sad smile. He reached towards her, longing to touch her one last time. This was not goodbye. He couldn't say the words. He couldn't say anything because he would see her again he had to. He would never forget meeting her.

 _ **So I'll kiss you longer babe**_

 _ **Any chance that I get**_

 _ **And I'll make the most of the minutes**_

 _ **And love with no regrets**_

It was their first night alone in months. As much as their children were their world, there are some things they didn't need to risk them seeing or hearing

He couldn't help that his girlfriend looked bloody gorgeous doing anything, even the cleaning. This was a child free day and he planned to make the most of it, he went up behind her, gently placing his hands on her waist pulling her into a deep and passionate kiss, hearing the moan escape her lips was enough of an invitation.

Clothes were shed on the way upstairs, some ripped, some carefully slid off.

She lay on the bed, smirking. This woman would be the death of him. He let his hands and lips explore her rather beautiful breasts, the familiar warmth of their two bodies instantly comforting. He moved his way down teasing her clit with his tongue, sucking gently. Regina was quivering in delight.

"You're so wet babe"

"Babe?" he heard her question. "I like it, thief"

He encaptured the rest of her words in his lips. "More Robin, please"

He obliged thrusting into her, making sure she wasn't hurt. The guttural moans reassured she hadn't.

They spent the night encased in each other, some of it spent making love, and some of it spent just holding each other.

 _ **Let's take our time**_

 _ **To say what we want**_

 _ **Use what we got**_

 _ **Before it's all gone**_

 _ **Cause no we're not promised tomorrow**_

Some people have a way with words. Others can never find the right one. Sometimes no words are needed.

Robin could not describe Regina in words. He could say how her eyes, a deep mahogany brown, were so full of emotion; they lit up when she smiled. They sometimes held a spark of defiance, anger even. He'd seen them defeated once, in the office, the day he'd left. He'd seen them shocked when Henry had turned up with Emma. Most of the time though they were filled with love. He could describe her almost raven hair, and how it was silky smooth, how it glistened in the sun, and moonlight.

He could describe every inch of her body. God knows he'd committed every curve, every beauty spot, and every scar to memory long ago.

That described her appearance. To try and encapsulate her spirit. Her personality. The way she would love without knowing. She would protect without hesitation. Her humour- sometimes dry and sarcastic, her laugh. Her smile, elusive but satisfying. Her heart, maybe not as red as blood but the fact that she never gave up showed true resilience.

On his wedding day he didn't know what to say because there were no words. Instead he reached out for her other hand, and began to sing

 _ **So I'm gonna love you**_

 _ **Like I'm gonna lose you**_

 _ **I'm gonna hold you**_

 _ **Like I'm saying goodbye.**_

 _ **/**_

 _ **Wherever we're standing**_

 _ **I won't take it for granted**_

 _ **Cause we'll never know**_

 _ **When we'll run out of time**_

His eldest son, once a young boy who had the courage to believe in stories of love, of loss, betrayal and vengeance, of family, now was a handsome gentleman about to walk down the aisle to the love of his life. Violet had long become part of the family, if only because Henry deserved to be loved by everyone. He deserved his happy ending. Henry was nervous, of doing something wrong. Robin had merely chuckled when henry had asked him. Henry you will do things wrong, because you are a human. You make mistakes. They'll be arguments over who left their cup lying around. You'll hurt her without even knowing. Just don't leave, give her space sometimes. As long as you are there for each other, as long as you love each other, the truth will never be hard to find.

He looked at the smile on his wife's face. One of unadulterated joy. This was all she had ever wanted for her little prince. He could see a twinge of sadness, he was no longer her little boy and cupped his hand in hers, and she offered him a grateful smile.

/

Henry was getting married. Regina knew this day would come. She also knew that if anyone could protect her prince's heart and love it with everything she was, it was Violet. The young girl, now woman had become part of her family. Sharing laughs, and concerns with Regina.

Regina remembers their first date. Henry had stuttered quite adorably asking her permission, just weeks after Robin had left. Regina knew he had loved Violet long before then, but had been helping her deal with grief. She couldn't help but chuckle at the twinge of fear in Violets eyes as she answered the door. At least he learnt that she still had the fear factor. Violet had hugged her that night, thanking her for raising Henry. She hoped that she could love him as much as his moms did. Regina knew then there was only one girl for Henry.

Here she was looking at someone who had guided her way since he was a babe, showing her that there was more to life than hatred, that love can conquer all. He had taught her how to smile. To be Regina. He had been by her side every step of his life. Now it was her turn to be by his. She held his hand, letting go as the music began to play, signalling the arrival of the bride. Violet was truly beautiful, her hair cascading her shoulders, a simple A-line dress, complimenting her figure.

Robin stood beside his wife, his son and daughter in law. He realised you realise that sometimes you have to believe those precious childhood stories, that the world is made up of faith and trust and pixie dust. That sometimes it's all about timing.

 **Thank you for reading. Leave a comment/review if you wish**


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